Thursday, September 29, 2011

Fuck the Red Sox (But Let's Not Forget Fuck the Mets Too)

It's insane that you can play 162 games and still the entire season for a handful of teams comes down to the final moment as it did last night.  I didn't get too wrapped up in the irony of the Yankees having a hand in whether or not the Red Sox made the postseason; first because I always feel lucky for the Yankees to make it to the postseason and would consider it bad luck to over-reach by also wanting to keep another team out, and secondly because I wasn't ready for the Mets to be able to relinquish the title of "Worst Chokers in the History of Baseball."  But it really couldn't have worked out better, the way the Yankees teased the Sox with a huge lead and then slowly giving it away in extra innings while Papelbon shit the bed on the mound at Camden.  Fuck Papelbon.

The silver lining for Sox fans is that after spending an uncomfortable 7 years having won 2 World Series, now they can go back to being crybabies wrapped up in their quilt of claims of being "cursed" and "snakepit" et al.  They're much more comfortable being the Sarah Palin of MLB than winners, so I suspect chowderheads slept well last night.

Then again, fuck 'em; how many more fucking times do we hafta hear about the Sox being made up of noble, scrappy warriors! as opposed to the Yankees' giant, non-hustling robots, and how unfair it is that the Yankees have such a large payroll, since of course the Sox have no money at all, but pick up players off the street who darn it, just wanna play the game "the right way."  The Red Sox' fans are an embodiment of the old joke:

"How does a white guy steal second base?" Sheer grit, determination and knowledge of the pitcher.
"How does a black guy steal second base?" He's fast.

Fuck 'em.  Ironically, before the season there was an air of Sox fans being miffed they would even have to go through the charade of playing a regular season, just as the Mets fans did the season of the grand collapse.  FUCK THEM.

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