Sigh. I Give Up.

A few weeks ago I thought Burger King had finally turned the corner and decided "fuck it, let's just do exactly what McDonalds does", but I guess the force of frat-boy stupidity is too powerful for them to resist: the bacon sundae.

But OH, gee, we're living in The Periclean Age of Bacon:

"I didn't start eating bacon because I wanted people to like me. And I certainly am not going to stop because those same people have moved on to the next fashionable flesh.

Wow! You like bacon! Gee, that means YOU FUCKING HAVE TASTE BUDS AND A MOUTH!! How new!! Going rogue, are we? Rebel! Because obviously nobody has ever discovered that before. "What's the word on bacon? Has that dj in Williamsburg gotten his review on it out yet? Is bacon good? What's the holdup?  We need to know, it's a complete fucking mystery to us!!!?!?!" Yes, salted cured meat is fucking awesome. Congrats Magellan. You're aMAzing!