Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Everybody Gotta Go Lotto Lotto

I ponied up $2 for Powerball so I'm abouttsta be crazy rich (peace out, bitches!) so of course I need everybody to see everything I've ever written about the fucking lottery.

One curious thing is I can't seem to glance at a tv or article online without people whining about how much it actually sucks to win the lottery, basically telling us common people to not even bother playing/dreaming. I mean, wtf? This sounds an awful lot like rich folks a coupla years back:
1) Recently I’ve picked up on this Glenn Beck guy; another right-wing talk show host that just tickles me to death. Unintentionally hysterical. Anyways. Bout 2 weeks ago or so I turn him on, kinda not paying close attention, and after a bit I start to notice what he’s ranting about. He’s imploring for us to understand that money does not bring happiness. PLEADING! He starts going on and on and on that great wealth and fortune brings NO happiness! You do NOT want to find this out the hard way!!! He goes on for like 15 minutes, pleading with us to not shoot for great wealth. He doesn’t offer alternate sources of happiness like family or faith or anything; just whatever you do, don’t try to become rich!!! Kinda weird, I think.

Then last week I see THIS article on cnn.com
What the fuck? Did all the rich people get together and decide to try to keep everyone else from becoming rich? “Don’t let them join our club!!!” Is this their plan, to tell us oh, just how MISERABLE they are!! Being rich ain’t like it used to be, it blows!! Really? When did this happen? Hey, my life sucks now; if I’m gonna be miserable I might as well be on a huge yacht with some titties in my face, no? And are people really gonna start saying “you know what guys, looks like being rich sucks, let’s stay poor.” Are models gonna start doing this? “Oh girls, being thin and beautiful is awful!!!! Do yourself a favor and eat anything that moves til you’re a big fat fuck!!” 
I’m calling conspiracy here.
On a side note, that edition of Things are Good has always been my least favorite. Very weak. My own Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite, if you will.

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