/* MOBILE FIX: stop forcing desktop min-width */ @media screen and (max-width: 800px) { body { min-width: 0 !important; } .content-outer, .content-fauxcolumn-outer, .region-inner { min-width: 0 !important; max-width: 100% !important; width: auto !important; } .main-inner .columns { padding-left: 0 !important; padding-right: 0 !important; } } .date-header { background: #000 !important; display: block !important; width: 100% !important; padding: 8px 12px !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; } .date-header span { background: transparent !important; } .post-header-line-1 { display: block !important; width: 100% !important; background: #000 !important; padding: 8px 12px !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; } .post-header-line-1 * { background: transparent !important; } /* --- XMastime fixes: titles + date bars + mobile --- */ /* Post titles: stop random centering */ h3.post-title, h2.post-title, .post-title { text-align: left !important; } /* Date header: make the black bar extend full width */ .post-header-line-1 { display: block !important; width: 100% !important; background: #000 !important; padding: 8px 12px !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; } .post-header-line-1 * { background: transparent !important; text-align: left !important; } /* Mobile: stop forcing huge desktop width */ @media screen and (max-width: 800px) { body { min-width: 0 !important; } .content-outer, .content-fauxcolumn-outer, .region-inner { min-width: 0 !important; max-width: 100% !important; width: auto !important; } .main-inner .columns { padding-left: 0 !important; padding-right: 0 !important; } } /* FORCE post titles consistent */ .post-title, .post-title a, h2.post-title, h3.post-title { text-align: left !important; } /* FORCE full-width date bar across common Blogger structures */ .date-header, .date-header span, .post-header, .post-header-line-1, .post-header-line-1 span, .post-outer .post-header-line-1, .post-outer .post-header, .blog-posts .post-header-line-1 { display: block !important; width: 100% !important; background: #000 !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; padding: 8px 12px !important; margin: 0 !important; } /* prevent inner bits from “breaking” the bar */ .date-header *, .post-header *, .post-header-line-1 * { background: transparent !important; text-align: left !important; } /* MOBILE: stop the fixed 1218px width behavior */ @media screen and (max-width: 800px) { body, .content-outer, .content-fauxcolumn-outer, .region-inner { min-width: 0 !important; max-width: 100% !important; width: auto !important; } .main-inner .columns { padding-left: 0 !important; padding-right: 0 !important; } } /* DATE HEADER: make the black bar go full width */ .date-outer, /* FORCE FULL WIDTH DATE BAR NO MATTER WHAT */ .date-outer, .date-posts, .date-posts h2, .date-posts h3, .date-header, h2.date-header, h3.date-header { display: block !important; width: 100% !important; background: #000 !important; padding: 10px 12px !important; box-sizing: border-box !important; margin: 0 0 18px 0 !important; } /* force the TEXT itself orange and remove any weird inner box */ .date-posts span, .date-header span, .date-posts h2 span, .date-posts h3 span { background: transparent !important; color: #ff6600 !important; display: block !important; width: 100% !important; } -->

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Very Normal Things That Happen In Airport Men's Rooms

Talking to a girl this morning (I believe we all know what that means, heh heh heh), I was reminded of when I flew The Short Bus down to Virginia two years ago. While at the airport I had to piss so I brought him into the bathroom, and since it was an airport and kids are abducted every 5 seconds at them I told him to stand beside me and hold onto my jeans while I pissed.  Him being a 3 year-old boy, of course he's obsessed with "pee-pees." I'm doing my thing, looking down and obviously thinking "YOU, sir, are the bee's knees!", when out of the corner of my eye I see a little head snaking into sight.

"YES, Rats!" he shouted in proud triumph, breaking away and jumping with a fist in the air, "you got a BIG pee-pee!!!"

Of course he never brings this up when chicks are around. Only the men's room at the airport. Sigh.

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