The Manny Tales

My charge has officially started crawling. Which is great, cause you can stuff a room full of plush stuffed animals, soft building blocks and satin-covered books and without fail he will worm himself all the way across the room to find the rusty razorblade that's buried underneath a teddy bear, a pile of onesies and a blanket. You turn your head for 3 seconds and somehow there he is. And when they do this they're always staring at you as they raise the forbidden objects sloooooowly to their mouths, as if taunting you. "You're really gonna let me do this? What are you, an asshole?" Never fails. These babies could literally find the rusty, e-bolic needle in the plush cottony haystack. These mfs should work for the FBI; put 'em in a crowded room and they will instantly crawl into the lap of the most wanted of terrorists. "Over here, numbnuts."








"Hahahaha!! You're gonna get fired for this one, fuckface!"