Thursday, October 04, 2007

What a "Journalist"!

I’ve been seething at Bob Raissman for fucking years now. Dude gets paid A LOT OF MONEY to basically watch Yankee games and squeal “oooh!! Oooh! Gotcha!!” the second the folks at “Yank-Zeera” show any sort of happiness re: Yankee play. GOD FORBID Jeter hits one out and Kenny Singeton says “wow, what a great hit.” This would lead this motherfucker to call Singleton to the mat and write up 800 words on what pandering propagandists the Yankee announcers are…on the Yankees own network. He’s beyond a fucking douche; I can’t believe he gets paid to whine and cry like a fucking baby.

And now Raissman is gleefully popping a hammy sprinting to tell us the big, ugly secret of playoff baseball. You ready for this? I don’t think you are…but, here it is anyway:

TBS would like to make money during the playoffs.

Wow. Thanks Bob. You did it! You cracked the case! Maybe tomorrow you can shriek that oh my, men like to have sex with women! Wow!!!! This just in: bears shit in the woods!!!!

And at the very end, shithead tries to lay a super-dramatic “can you believe the unfairness?” line on us with “At least the fans fortunate enough to have cable TV.” Hmm. I’m sorry dickhead, but maybe what, 3% of homes don’t have cable now? This isn’t 1966, nobodies fucking with the rabbit ears to get the picture un-fuzzy. But he wants us to get gut-punched as if we’re talking about starving children. Fuck you, dickhead. Get a fucking life. And take your stupid, gay, "look at me!!" wannabe walrus mustache with you.

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