Thursday, November 08, 2018

This is the Greatest Twitter Thread of My Lifetime.

Friday, November 02, 2018

Thoughts. I Have Them.

I'm fairly shocked that It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia hasn’t done a straight-up parody of Rocky. Charlie as Rocky, Frank as Mickey and the Waitress as Adrian. 

Thanksgiving Covers Everybody!!!

The folks over at Eater are asking which food magazine has the best Thanksgiving cover this year.

Me? I vote for the Southern Living one, I like the way the dishes look like they're cascading down.

Memory Lane du Jour.

I once had a woman say "I want you to fuck me like an animal." I was shocked. "Oh my god," I said, "you heard about that??!?!!?"

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

State du Moi.

Me, 5 weeks ago: “Dammit that’s it, I’m finally getting a microwave so I can easily steam bags of vegetables and be much healthier. Enough eating pure crap!”

What I’ve cooked in it to date: popcorn.

Thoughts. I Have Them.

After watching and loving A League of Their Own for years I suddenly wonder why we were always ok with Marla Hooch ditching the team mid-season to marry a guy she met after her season had already started. 

State du Moi.

I own 4 belts and don't fucking like any of them.

Something You Should Know About Me.

I saw Andy Pettitte pitch at Yankee Stadium in three different decades.

Happy Halloween!

Xmastime Halloween moments thru the years!

Tragedy: girl in office everyone ignored  :(
Comedy: Count Jackula!
Classic: my "razor in an apple" riff!
On the run: the night my gang of street tuffs robbed a bodega
Winner: Poptop wins costume contest dressed!
10 years ago: a Fort Greene Halloween!
Now I'm sad they're growing up: more of my Brooklyn Gang!
Review: Young Larroca's spine-tingling movie debut, Monster!
"This fucking blows - let's bounce, fellas!"

Friday, October 26, 2018

Uber du Jour

Don't even wanna know what happens if you don't give this fucker 5 stars.

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

Thoughts. I Have Them.

If racists wanna somehow make Jefferson Davis likable to non-racists maybe they should get it out there that the college he attended was called "Transylvania University."

Ideas. I Have Them.

Go around the office at 5pm today saying, "dammit, I spent all day thinking it was Sunday."

State du Moi.

If Young Me knew how little interest Old Me has in eating these he'd be very, very disappointed.

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

OFAH du Jour

Anyone who's read this blog for more than 10 minutes knows I'm totally obsessed with Only Fools and Horses. I discovered it in January 2015 and have posted about it oh, maybe 10,000 times. My first one came a few weeks into my fandom, HERE.


Today I stumbled into a reference to it in a post of mine...IN 2011!!

I guess this post was my announcing I wanted to go to London by my 40th birthday, as it's a pictograph of all things great about London. "I wonder..." I thought as I squinted real hard at it and YEP!! there it is, Del Boy's famous three-wheeled van! :)

Too Many Birthday Plates

In 1996 I was living in Oxford, Mississippi. For a Mississippi town it was fairly progressive, but by any normal comparison was still pretty pumped to be white.

One day for my lunch hour I went to a restaurant in the local mall, Legends. Walking thru the restaurant to the back I passed a long table covered with birthday plates and balloons and other birthday paraphernalia. In the center was a black man with (presumably) his son. They were both beaming, excited about the birthday party to come. I was pumped for the kid myself, and continued walking to my booth in the back.

After eating a sensible meal of vegetables, super-foods and superduper-foods, I was walking back thru the restaurant to leave when I saw the table. I saw the father. And the kid.

And nobody else.

Nobody had come to the kid's damn birthday party.

I'll never forget their heartbroken faces. I barely made it out and into my car before some waterworks came out of my salty eyes. And yes, him being black and in Mississippi made it even worse.

20+ years later, it's happened again. To a white kid, but still heartbreaking.


I went home that day and wrote a song, Too Many Birthday Plates. It went on to become a show staple, I'm pretty sure my band played it every we did from 1999-2012. One day The Barber and I were sitting around 100 Metro and decided to cut a demo of it, which is below. Yes, our fretwork changed the way rock guitar was played. Yes, we challenged how someone could be transformed by music.

But I can still see that kid and his dad. And I can still feel it.

Monday, October 22, 2018

Thoughts. I Have Them.

Why do couples go on a honeymoon at the absolute greatest moment of their marriage - shouldn’t they save it for a few years later when their marriage really needs a boost? 🤔

Oh Great.

Now everyone at work knows I buy my dress shirts at Costco.


Still a Good Question.

Announcement du Jour

This bag of microwave popcorn may officially declared to be well-popped.

Weekend, VI

Having three kids under 8 years old at a table that features a lazy Susan is basically a race to see who’s gonna get violently hauled off to a time-out first.