Dexter Manley That's Correct, I Said Dexter Manley

Jesus. That was a roller-coaster, this shit could be a short film.

MUKLUKS: Rrthur (YES, ladies, THAT Rrthur!!!!!) 

First Couple Ever Brought Together by the Well-Worn "AWOOOOOOOOOGAH!!!/Googly-Eyes Strategy Celebrates 62nd Wedding Anniversary

Sunday Morning with Xmastime

Christians wanna believe in & fight for a God who is so monstrously evil in his first book that they dismiss it in enthusiastic favor of the sequel of which the main plot centers around God deciding you know what, if you torture and murder my son I might be nice to you. 🤔

This has been Sunday morning with Xmastime.

Xmastime So Sayeth, So Sayeth Xmastime

The people who came up with the idea to use gravel under train tracks should be the people running the country.

Sunday Morning with Xmastime

So...Christians wanna believe in & fight for a God who would start it all by putting two naked people together & then getting upset when things went off the rails? Really?

This has been Sunday morning with Xmastime.

Another Country Western Song Title in Search of a Song

There's a Dog Fight at the Panera (and I've Got Tickets)

SEE PREVIOUS SONGS HERE

"Made Me Sit on His Lap. 0 Stars."

I Don't Think They Mean This.

An Xmastime Audio Prayer Card

PREVIOUS (STANDARD) PRAYER CARDS HERE

Metro Ride of Anxiety

I got on the Metro and somebody had left their giant water bottle in the seat next to the one I sat down on & my anxiety grew at every stop as I realized people must be looking at me like "fuck this asshole, taking up a seat with his fucking water bottle, what a piece of shit" and the reason I know this is that if the roles were reversed I would 100% be looking at them like "fuck this asshole, taking up a seat with his fucking water bottle, what a piece of shit"; finally my dread was somewhat assuaged when I realized not only was it a Barbie water bottle, but the giant Barbie logo was VERY obvious to anybody on the train - to say nothing that the bottle was pink - and since I basically look like a MAGA fever dream built in a lab, surely nobody would think it was my bottle.

XMASTIME TV REVIEW

Life, Larry and the Pursuit of Unhappiness

Despite being a HUGE LARRY DAVID FAN!!! I mentioned my concern about this show a while back & after watching the first episode, it's even worse than I'd feared. It's pretty much Larry standing around throughout a few scenes set in history reciting old bits from Seinfeld & Curb Your Enthusiasm; his rattling off from The Official Larry David Canon of Society Rules is made even more cringe-inducing by the constant shoehorned setups by the other actors. Truly shocking how bad it is - I assumed it'd be just like I've said but still easy/fun to watch, but it was none of those things & even I'm surprised at my own struggle to make it through the entire 30 minutes.

It's only the first episode so you never know, but I have a feeling we know.

Yes, Xmastime, It IS Crazy!" - Xmastime fans

It's crazy that for decades and decades the radio played popular songs released by record companies & we'd all huddle up next to our radios with tape recorders WAITING for those songs to be played so we could record them & while yes it was "illegal" wink, wink, it was also a tacit arrangement to keep people excited about the songs they liked - I can promise you the next time a rock star gets pissed off hearing a fan tell them their "omg I used to huddle up next to my radio waiting to record your song when it came on the radio!!" story will be the first one - and yet having a snippet of a song pop up in a single episode of a television show can lead to entire seasons not being allowed to be stream because of insane licensing deals from the 1960s.

Questions. I Have Them.

Is the Republican party in Congress today currently under the process of enacting the single greatest voluntary transfer of power in almost a thousand years; are they the exact reverse of the Magna Carta? 🤔🤷‍♂️

Oh FFS

This drives me BONKERS!!! Why would you put the icon to skip to the next show on the left of the screen and the name of the episode you're currently watching on the right side when the natural directional flow of any user who's used to reading books from left to right (sorry China!) WHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS????? 😡😡😡😡

Xmastime So Sayeth, So Sayeth Xmastime

Living is easy but life is hard.

XMASTIME FILMS

LOOKING OUTSIDE MY WINDOW IN RESTON VA ON A THURSDAY EVENING

Watch Previous Xmastime Films Here

TAKE MY TEENAGE HEAD at 30 🤗🕺🎸🥁❤️

One of Those Days

I mean amirite? 🤷‍♂️😜

Ah well, let's try again tomorrow everybody 👍.

Wannabe THE ONION Headline

SHERYL STILL PICKING AT FUCKING SALAD 47 MINUTES INTO MEETING

Sometimes I Scare Myself with My Own Genius

Should-be Hold Steady lyric:

"And she said man you know I love Iggy
But he's the least incredible thing about I Wanna Be Your Dog
And then she puked lime green Big Gulp all over my Keds"

PREVIOUS HOLD STEADY GENIUS FROM XMASTIME HERE