Xmastime Blog Recommendation du Week

Margaret and Helen. Two GOP-hatin' ladies from Texas, lifelong friends in their 80's
 
("Have you really been friends for 60 years?
Some friendships last a lifetime.  We just seem to be living a hell of a long time.")

I've peeped in off and on for a year or two now and they always crack my shit up ("Pat Buchanan is a Cracker.") From what I can tell, it's really them doing the posting, it's not a fake site by some kid. Awesome. Here's some sample gems from Thanksgiving Week:

Honestly, Margaret, I have never understood her insistence on cornbread stuffing with nuts in it.  That combination would suck the moisture out of a Kleenex.   I just don’t know about you Yankees sometimes.  Stubborn as the day is long.  Nuts in your dressing.  I never…

Speaking of nuts, that dumb ass son-in-law of mine really did give me Sarah Palin’s book to review just like he said he would...Surely it couldn’t be as bad as that Coulter crap I read a few months ago.  After all, it has all the makings of a fine novel:  a rags to riches story filled with heartwarming musings  about drilling for oil, raising your children’s children, and getting even with the world.  I even hear the main character is really a vampire...Tell Howard not to bother buying a copy for himself.  I’ll send him this one when I am done.  Maybe your sister-in-law could use it to stuff her turkey at Christmas.

Thanksgiving dinner will be moved to Friday after all of you have returned from your important tailgating party.  And now that I have made that little sacrifice, I am sure you will all work extra hard to comply with a few rules. 

1.  Cloe.  I am begging you honey.  None of that Jello crap.  No one eats it and the garbage stinks for a week after I throw it out.  You and Jello are like Palin and McCain.   How many times before you learn no one wants seconds much less firsts.

4.  Rhonda.   It’s my oven and once again I’ll  be using it right up until mealtime.  If you can’t bring something that doesn’t require heating, then don’t bring anything at all.

5. If I see one grandchild doing that texting stuff, there will be no pie for dessert. Now-a-days the only thing mobile about your phone is your thumbs.  Trust me.  Skinny thumbs and a fat ass are not a good look.

8. Jonathan.  How a Republican ended up in this family is beyond me, but we love you all the same.  That said, Reagan is dead darling.   Get over it.

11. Marshall.  I am sure you believe that your children sing beautifully.  Don’t put me in a situation where I have to make you question your beliefs.

Dying. Bookmark, enjoy!