Nangulance: n. the minor turbulances of life that, while small and nebulous, can collect to make your head explode.
I found myself boarding the train this morning alongside a stunningly beautiful young woman; once we got inside, the train being full and everybody shuffling/cramming meant I lost sight of her. My only hope was that once most people were dumped out at Union Square, she's still be aboard, continuing to either 6th or 8th Avenue (my stop...lose this info, stalkers!) In a surprising turn of events considering nothing fortuitous in this life has ever happened to me, once everybody cleared out I found her not only on the now almost-empty train, but sitting across from an empty seat, in which I promptly sexily/smoothly plopped down onto so I could spend the rest of the ride stealing looks at her hotness, prolly culminating in her picking up on my scent and demanding we get off at the next stop and enjoy amorous relations. For once in my life I was happy we were stalled for "train traffic ahead," giving me more time to soak in her beauty/defeat her will and resistance with a slew of Jedi mind tricks.
AND THEN.
Some fat fucking Chinese dude walks the length of the car and then STOPS EXACTLY IN BETWEEN ME AND HER!!! What???! ALLLLLLLLLLLL the wide open space and open seats, and he just stops right there, completely blocking my view of her. Now, he's not even chosen that space to grab an overhead bar to hang onto, HE'S JUST FUCKING STANDING THERE, drinking a cup of coffee! I've never, ever seen this done before, and of course this is the moment it decides to fucking happen. Train takes off he's still standing there, casually looking around and sipping his coffee; instead of looking at my future widow I'm looking at his little Chinese nuts. Seconds later the train stops, and, as if I even need to tell you what happened next, she walks off the train and he of course remains, nuts in my face.
Fuck. Ing. HELL!!!
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