110-52
A-Rod 52 dingers. MVP. Hits .459 in postseason, 4 World Series homers. Traded the day after World Series after being voted “Worst Yankee Ever” with 98% of the votes. The other 2% of course reserved for Aaron Boone who, as a result of hurting his knee back in 2003, is the reason we got "stuck with this fucking loser A-Rod!"
Bernie flown back in after Damon has some "dicey cheese”
Abreu 95 doubles. August before we hear what his speaking voice sounds like.
Mo 44 saves. Despite being on vacation in July, when replaced by Danny Almonte as a goof.
Giambi big year, and will be getting up in Cory Lidle's widow's tongety tong tong. Camon. I saw that walk to the mound for the first pitch. You can't include "widow" and "mound" in the same scene and not get some Jordache jeans crumpled on the bedroom floor, right?
Matsui huge year. But will be eaten by a shark before playoffs. Just saying, I got a feeling. Will miss him.
Jeter comes to terms that yes, A-Rod is better looking than him and gives up his feud. “A-Rod will always be better looking,” he tells Michael Kay on Centerstage “but he’ll never be half-white.” Bear hug photo-op at Chuck E. Cheese, no more drama.
Pavano, Pettitte and Weng each win 20 games. Moose? 4. Aight, just tweaking Op...he’ll easily win 5 or 6, no problem.
Yanks will deal for Clemens. Team will rise up like 1980 Olympic Hockey team and vociferously oppose, screaming “dammit George, THIS is your team!! Do not do this!” George threatens to take the french toast sticks out of the post-game spread, team shouts back resoundingly “Sorry! We thought you meant someone else!! Welcome, Roger! Agaain, so sorry, our mistake!!!”
Won’t lose a game in the playoffs. You heard it here first, fans.
1 comment:
Schmuck you.
Black widow
Post a Comment