Wednesday, July 18, 2007

The Ground is Rumbling!

The big rumor in burger world. Lord - In & Out finally going head to head with the Shake Shack?!?!!? Chamberlain/Russell, Bird/Magic and now this? My big dream has always been to become a billionaire so I can travel around to sample each of the burgers from Hamburger America. Well, or actually be succesful/productive in any way. Cough. Hope this is true.

Irony: just started a "No Meat for One Week" regime at midnight. Weird.

I WILL NOW RANK THE HAMBURGER AMERICA BURGERS IN ORDER OF WHICH I'D LIKE TO TRY THEM:

Solly's Grille (butter burger!! wipe the drippings off my chest with the neighbor's cat)
Dyer's (deep fried!!!!!! sounds like a marriage made in heaven, like Ben Wa and balls...however, I wonder why something like this, a combination of two things uber-American, wouldn't be found all over the place...seems like it would be amazing, but can it be if something so generic is that hard to find? I wonder)
Ted's Meridian (steamed, tons of cheese)
Billy Goats Tavern (newly obsessed with the idea that thinner is better in a burger. oh wait, that's with chicks hiyoooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!)
Meers Store (pick your own cow out back. sounds like every high school party I went to)
Goober Burger (gutsy...will the waitress stick to the roof of my mouth?)
Louis Lunch (dry white toast. thanks, assface)
Bobcat Bite (ugh....a nibble at best)

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