Thursday, July 05, 2007

Today's Re-Thoughts

Talking about "The Bronx is Burning" got me thinking, and I've decided that the people from the 1977 blackout could pretty much beat the shit out of us from the 2003 one. I mean, those dudes were looting and raping and burnt down Bushwick while having to worry about the Son of Sam capping them. In 2003 we all got drunk off free beer from the bars ("it'll go bad in the taps; drink! no ice, drink!" and free food from the bodegas ("the food will spoil! eat! eat!") I'm surprised Bloomburg didn't pass out free kittens to all of us for being such great, orderly citizens. What a bunch of pussies. Maybe we are heading back towards a more 1950's NYC. A time, as The Barber once said, "When Whites Ruled Brooklyn."

Also, re: fireworks. They're always so predictable, which leads to the inevitable disappointment - like a movie sequel, or the first time you realize that that wasn't a beer I spilled in the bed while you were sleeping. Wouldn't it be better if all of a sudden one year they shot them off without warning a day early? Let's say it's July 3, you're in your apartment jerking off into the pair of drawers you asked your 11 year-old pen pal to mail you and BOOM!!!!! fireworks!! Now wouldn't that be exciting? Impromptu soiree, everyone's in a great mood. Just saying. Fucking U-S-A, motherfuckers!

4 comments:

Rambler said...

The main reason we didn't have the looting and violence was because unlike 77 (and homey was living in Northern Jersey at the time), 2003 blackout started in daylight. Cops had a good four hours to be out in force and keep the jacking of the bodegas and TV shops to a minimum. Also, can't underestimate the Sept. 11 effect. People more concerned with what might be coming next than what to steal from Key Foods.

That said, city is a lot wimpier now.

Anonymous said...

Oh, you're a wild one alright....This kid needs one night in the State Pen for that thill of unpredictability.

Anonymous said...

Wasn't that a subplot in 30 Rock? Jack proposed a show, Fireworks over Manhatten, but when he did it without prior notice - people got a little worried about the explosions downtown.

BayonneMike said...

Since when did The Barber become an expert on all things Brooklyn? Isn't he from the No See Em state? I love when transplants to some trendy neighborhood all of a sudden become local historians. I can see him now, rocking back on his milk crate in front of 100 Metro a few years from now, "I remember when you could get a cup of coffee on Bedford for $6."