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Friday, August 03, 2007

Cops and Heads

I don't think I could be a cop cause I don't wanna be putting my hands on the dude's head as I'm putting him in the squad car. He's a criminal, I doubt his hair is the cleanest thing in the world. And why do they do this anyway? All I ever heard from my mother growing up was "oh, will you just get in the goddam car!?!?!" But a cop, after chasing you down, tackling you and beating you with a stick oh-so-carefully escorts you into the car, delicately making sure your precious head doesn't, god forbid, bump the top of the door. wtf.

3 comments:

here. said...

you did NOT use the dino turd encrusted cop car head joke ... dude, next time use the one about making the plane out of the same stuff as the black box

Gina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gina said...

what about bathing 90 year old women with pendulous breasts? Could you do that?