A Few Quick Sports Thoughts

- Am I dreaming, or were there as many teams playing in bowls this year as there are that play in March Madness every year? Can the NCAA do something to make the bowls even more meaningless, please? Maybe a few more Ball State/Rutgers games a few days after Jan 1? Push the “title game” back to Valenetine’s Day? Can we make this happen?

- If Roger Clemens started taking roids cause he was getting old and wanted to extend his career, why was 2001 the last time he took them?

- If Pete Carroll leaves USC for the NFL, he’s an idiot. He can live the next 3 decades as a golden god in SoCal. His Trojans are so far beyond the rest of the West Coast, he can sit back and pick and choose blue chippers every year, go 12-0 and be worshipped. Going to the NFL doesn’t necessarily mean a promotion, Pete.

- Same thing for Les Miles. He shoulda left for Michigan and become the USC of the Midwest. Big 10 is down, he can roll in and dominate, go 12-0 and play USC every year for the title. Now he’s stuck in the SEC where you’re lucky to only lose twice a year and hafta kill yourself to get kids over Florida, Georgia etc etc. Big mistake, Les.

- I’m glad Joe Gibbs is retiring. He was on the verge of becoming way too insignificant and was looking bad doing it; in a strange way Sean Taylor’s death saved his legacy. Who better than Joe Gibbs to be in charge when something like that happens? Then they went on a hot string and ended the season and his career positively. Even a Skins hater like me didn’t enjoy watching Gibbs look baffled all season, so good for him.

- People need to get off Tony Romo’s ass for hanging out with Jessica Simpson. They hung out on a beach, while he was off. She’s not Yoko Ono, she’s not insisting on being in the goddam huddle discussing plays. I know tv these days aren’t allowed to talk sports for 5 straight minutes anymore without trying to squeeze in some T&A, but give it a rest already.

- I’m not surprised Britney Spears had a meltdown, but is this the longest one in history? I mean everybody snaps, everyone has a rough patch. Celebs love doing it for attention, but it’s usually a week or so, no? The Britney craziness has been going on for over a year now, hasn’t it? Jesus, does anyone remember Britney when she WASN'T in the middle of a crazed meltdown? Unreal. It's like trying to remember that at one time Joan Rivers was a comedian. Kudos for her for keeping this shit up without dying so far.

- Been re-watching the Rocco DiSpirito reality show “The Restaurant.” Can there be more of a clusterfuck than this fucking place? Who’s this wait staff, the cast of Ben-Hur? Christ. And I’m sorry, but they’re only meatballs…I’m sure they’re great, but how “amazing” can Mama’s meatballs be? Camon.

- If Barack gets elected president, would that be the single greatest time ever to be the vice-president? hiyooooo!!! sorry, couldn't resist. too easy.