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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Jesus Christ; The Right Wing Has Even Made Charlie Fucking Daniels Boring as Shit

You guys know how much I love Charlie Daniels. No matter how down I get, I know I can always go to good ol' Charlie, read a little bit of his alarmist nonsensical bullshit and be cheered up by his over-the-top breadpan dough idiocy. Tonight I saw he had a new "Soap Box" post, and quickly shot to it. To whit:
I'm going to shock some of you people, others I will probably anger and some of you will be amused at what I'm going to say in this column, but I don't care if I'm the last man standing I would be less than honest and candid if I didn't say it.

Oooooooooooohh!! I'm tingling - this is gonna be GOOOOOOOOOD I'm thinking; this is gonna be some EXTRA-stupid batshit conservative jackoff stuff!! Hit me with it Charlie; give it to me!!!
People if we don't get real this country is going to slip right out from under us, or rather be pulled right out from under us by a President bent on socialism and a power mad Democratic Congressional leadership.

Whhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? CD, that's the best you can do? Really? Every Republican across the land spouts that out before breakfast. There's beloved fetuses that can recite this little ditty; Newt Gingrich Twitters the exact same lines every time he cuts one ("every time, my dead dumped wife gets her wings!")

Charlie. VERY disappointing. Maybe you can take a step back, remember how good it felt when you first started spouting utterly false buffoonish shit BEFORE IT WAS GOP 101? I mean, actual Congressmen are spouting those lines..."socialism"? That's it? Can't at least use "fascism"? And "slip right out" sounds a bit peaceful; maybe if you had taken a nap this afternoon you could've used "kamikazied," or maybe "machete into white slavery"? Lazy Charlie. Camon.

Hey hey hey, now, Charlie, listen to me: it's not that I'm mad at you. I'm just disappointed is all. I mean, are you even trying anymore?

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