Shit I Want Obama to Address in Tomorrow NIghts SOTU, Vol 4

"One of my first promises of this year will be to make sure Slade doesn't keep showing up and banging the real housewives every season. Jo, then Laurie, now Gretchen. What is this, Little Women? Hey, I get it - you're  a fucking douchebag who wants to be on tv; can't you just go into politics like the rest of us?"