Mommy Book Club

I'm gonna start a "New Mommy Book Club," allowing only women who have given birth within the past few weeks. I think it might go like:

"Okay, last week we said we'd read the first three chapters; let's go around the room from left to right starting here, lemme know how far each of you got. Leslie?"

"Page 2."
"I started the first chapter."
"What book are we reading?"
"Seriously, I'm cutting my husband's dick off if he wakes me up again."
"Page 3. Oh, wait...didn't start."
"Fuck you."
"I'm in the wrong room. Just let me sit here for another minute."
"Oh, who gives a shit."
"Great. I'm leaking."
"I just came here to close my eyes."
"Blajdfuhf8737836%%&(!!"