HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR. PRESIDENT!!

I've given Dubyanuts a lot of shit over the years, but you gotta give credit where credits due, and the dude pulled off some amazing shit. First of all, he convinced over 50 million Americans to look another four years of runaway peace and prosperity in the eye and say "fuck it, let's hand things over to the guy who had trouble finding oil in Texas." That's pretty amazing. And THEN, after about a shit-tasticcally crappy first term as could be imagined, he got everybody to come out four years later and do it AGAIN! Give the guy credit, that would be like Lorena Bobbitt getting a second chance at romance from John.

Also give him credit for showing American children another path to the American Dream. A lot of dorky little politicians will show up and prattle on and on about hitting the books and working your ass off to achieve your goals blah blah fucking blah; and yet here comes a guy who says hey look, it doesn't have to be like that, there's an easier way! Be born into an insanely rich and politically powerful family and have a father who is the president and you too can end up banging nuts in the Lincoln Bedroom any ol' day of the week you want! Hell, you'll get a baseball team handed to you for fuck's sake! For all his faults, it was Bush who reminded kids it doens't hafta be that complicated. Take a lesson, nerds!!!!!!

And as if all that wasn't enough already, it was Bush who reminded us that America is too fucking good to be getting a 12:01am whuppin and made for damn sure certain that he launched us head-first out of a cannon into a 5:30am whuppin.' Because, as he'd say, America deserves that much respect.

Happy 64th, buddy. And yes, I WOULD like to have a beer with you!!

Also, the dude loves eating pussy, which makes him alright with me.