Montana, but Not the Hannah Kind

The Right Wing is of course losing it's collective shit because Helena, Montana has decided that it's schools should teach:

first graders “that human beings can love people of the same gender;” second graders “not to make fun of people by calling them ‘gay’ or ‘queer;’” and fifth and sixth graders that “there are several types of intercourse.”

Or, as one parent said, "“This is about reality and truth so our kids don’t grow up in La-La-Land.”

Of course La-La-Land is exactly where "conservatives" want children to be when it comes to things like science, no matter how dangerous this can be. But my question is, shouldn't these very conservatives be applauding any decision made by such a small locality? I mean, this is a town of 30,000 people deciding themselves what they want their kids to be learning in school. And not some gay, faggy French East Coast elitist school either - this is bacon coming outta the taps, flannel-wearing tough guy cowboy red state Montana. Shouldn't conservatives see this as a victory of small government? Or would they be happier if Obama forced the school to teach "it's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve"? Somehow I doubt it.

Of course they're only happy to show faux outrage over something that doesn't espouse their fake-Jesusy "family values" nonsense that gets stupid people into the voting booths. "Small government" is a right-wing tenet, unless said small government isn't pushing a bunch of failed policies that do nothing but waste everyone's time and money.