King of the World

Yesterday I watched about 20 minutes of Titanic, which, let's be honest, makes me a gay.

I like the scene when the lifeboats were filling up, and you'd see this over and over:

Husband: Onto the boat, dear.
Wife: (starts getting into boat, then leaps back to her husband) NO Winston! I'm staying with you, my husband!!
Husband: DAMMIT Doris - get opn the goddam boat!! (grabs her and throws her into the boat)

If it was me, it'd go like this:

Xmastime Onto the boat, dear.
Wife: (starts getting into boat, then leaps back to her husband) NO Xmastime! I'm staying with you, my husband!!
Xmastime: Okay.

or

Xmastime Onto the boat, dear.
Wife: (starts getting into boat)
Xmastime: So...you're really doing it? Really?
Wife: You said get in the boat.
Xmastime: 8 years of marriage, and NOW you decide to listen to me?
Wife: Well, I-
Xmastime: Fine, whatevs. Get in the boat, leave me here to die, have fun. I just hope I get eaten by a shark before I freeze to death. Whatever, whaddyou care.