It's Getting Worse for Chris Brown - Now We Know He's a Shitty Basketball Player

Who Does He Think He Is, Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuf?

A side note re: Buuuuf. THE single worst basketball player ever. And I’m not exaggerating. Hell, I don’t know how he even made the team by our junior year. My 8th grade year over 100 kids tried out for the jv team, and I was one of only two 8th graders that made it. Buuuf? Cut. My sophomore year the team was great, won the district (I was playing jv that year, since it became obvious Varsity had no room for my 40 shots a game.) For some reason the next year, if you showed up and were alive, you made the team. Hence, Buuuf. His shot had to be seen to be believed: grabbing the ball with both hands at one hip, he would swing the ball clockwise over his head, releasing it into the stratosphere in a manner, shall we kindly say, haphazardly. The killer tho? You know how great shooters, upon releasing the ball will shout out “good!”? Buuuuf, god bless him, the ball would still be in his hands as he’s winding up his shot and he’d announce “off!” Dynamite.

During practice, the funnest team to be on was offense when Coach was focusing on team defense. You'd have complete carte-blanche to run and gun all you wanted; there was no ridiculous trying-to-be-Dr. J play you could try that he would even notice, as he was so focused on how the defense was playing.

Except, of course, Buuuuuuuuuuuuuf. One day during one of these sessions Buuuuf uncorked such a gawd-awful, "what the fuck?" shot that ended up in the hallway somewhere that Coach was stopped in mid-sentence and could only stare at Buuuuf for a minute before finally asking "are you alright? you're not driving yourself home, are you?"; this remained the one and only time any one of us saw Coach bother to question something the offense had done during these sessions.