The Universe is a Strange Place.

The people at Kam Sing don't speak English and look incredibly baffled whenever I give them my order, and that's to their face -  over the phone I can never even tell if anyone's on the other end.  And yet they've screwed up an order of mine exactly zero times in over a decade.

Meanwhile, lunch from the bodega around the corner just now was pretty typical:

Me: I'd like turkey, American cheese, lettuce and mayonnaise on rye bread please.  No tomato.
Sandwich maker: turkey, American cheese, lettuce and mayonnaise on rye bread, no tomato?
Me: that's right. (remind guy about the no tomato)

Get home, unwrap sandwich to find:

ham, Swiss cheese, lettuce, tomato, no mayonnaise.  Cap doffed, fuckhead.