Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Ridin' Palin

People are giving Sniffy in the Sky with Diamonds shit for her Magical Mystery Tour, accusing her of using schmaltzy faux patriotism to whip stupid people into a frenzy for her to run for president, including a trip to Gettysburg.  I think these people are missing the point - Palin didn't go there for her own interests, she went there to teach the American public about the most important battle in The War Southern States Pretend Wasn't About Being Allowed to Own Niggers.  Personally, I think we should all thank the governor for reminding us of one of the greatest speeches of all time, The Gettysburg Address.
This is where they fought the battle of Gettysburg. Fifty thousand men died right here on this field, fighting the same fight that we are still fighting among ourselves today. This green field right here, painted red, bubblin' with the blood of young boys. Smoke and hot lead pouring right through their bodies. Listen to their souls, men. I killed my brother with malice in my heart. Hatred destroyed my family. You listen, and you take a lesson from the dead. If we don't come together right now on this hallowed ground, we too will be destroyed, just like they were. I don't care if you like each other of not, but you will respect each other. And maybe... I don't know, maybe we'll learn to play this game like men.

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