Rescue Me

I just watched my annual 4 minutes of Rescue Me, just enough to remind me oh yeah, this IS the most offensivly overwrought shit out there today.  Rescue Me is the Foo Fighters of television, emotion-by-the-numbers nonsense that surely only resonates with thoughtless sheep.  Fucking christ.

Whenever I flip on the show, I think gee, I like Denis Leary, I should like Rescue Me. But then after about thirty seconds I groan, reminded of every episode of the show I've ever seen, which every week is a slight variation of this:

10 (FX) "Rescue Me." Denis Leary's Tommy Gavin has his hands full. Way full. Tommy and his dead cousin's wife, Sheila (Callie Thorne), rehash old memories, and oh what memories they have. And Tommy finds himself unsettled when Sully's wife wants to have a foursome with him and two other girls. Then the chief's wife offers no-strings attached sex, which upsets Tommy because the widow of every firefighter killed on 9/11 have sent naked pictures of themselves to him with propositions. Also, his cousin's ghost haunts him. During a massive fire Tommy saves two women, who try to seduce him, but he is upset because they want no-strings attached sex with him - oh wait, there's strings, if he agrees to having sex with them he also has to have sex with his dead cousin's (killed in 9/11) two ex-wives. His dead cousin haunts him, while he's being asked by his ex-wife to cornhole her in front of his best friend's college-aged daughters, who are angry because they've already propositioned him but he was too upset to perform because he's haunted by his dead cousin. Also, Tommy almost drinks. But then he is propositioned by the owner of the ABC store, whose husband died in a fire and wants to watch Tommy sleep with her triplet daughters, which upsets Tommy because as she is propositioning him he is trying to finish up a rim-job session with the mayor's wife. F/X 10PM

Oh, for fuck's sake.