Are You There, God? It's Me, Dumbass

I was looking at this post about Judy Blume joining Twitter, giving myself a moment to moist myself over the nostalgia of reading her books when I was a kid, when I saw this:

I was, however, slightly disheartened to learn that some of Blume's books were edited for updates - updates of the Times They Are A-Changin' kind. For example, reprints of the books in the "Fudge" series switched up the Christmas gift list of the book's character Peter: the coveted record player is replaced with an MP3 player and so forth. Little Fudge doesn't watch "The Electric Company" and "The Muppet Show" anymore - he watches Nickelodeon.

What?  That might be THE STUPIDEST FUCKING THING I'VE EVER HEARD!!  Some kid doesn't know what a record player is?  Hey, here's an idea - take 4 fucking seconds and look it up!  For fuck's sake, Superfudge isn't even thirty years old!  I'm surprised we haven't updated A Tale of Two Cities so that it's about us and the Taliban, since gee, maybe Skippy doesn't know what London or Paris is, and we don't wanna sprain his fucking brain.  "It was the shizzle of times, it was whack times, dawg..." For fuck's sake.  I already don't like when book covers are changed, and they've been changing the actual text too?  Unreal.  I can't believe an author would even agree to such a thing.