The Best of Frasier Crane

One thing I do in restaurants that I really need to stop doing is physically pointing out what I’ve ordered from the menu to the waitress. And you know me, I always get a fucking cheeseburger, but when the waitress looks at me I always hold up the menu and point to the listing “Yeah, I’ll have the cheeseburger deluxe…with fries…” as if I’m the first person ordering a cheeseburger. And then I hear myself reminding the poor woman that “deluxe” means “with fries”, cause I’m sure she’s spent most of the day serving people sliced-almond framboise with snow peas and cranberry moo goo gai pan and my order of a cheeseburger with fries is gonna throw the kitchen for a curve. I’m waiting for a waitress to grab the menu and look perplexed “The wha? What the…well. I’ll see if Tony can make this.” I’m such an idiot.