Mostly, this gives us a chance to go deeeeeeeeeeeeeeep into the annals (heh heh heh) of Xmastime history, with one of the first posts ever! Hello, 2005!!
Each of us has MAYBE one chance at greatness in our lives. Robin Lovitt had a chance of becoming a milestone, a Trivial Pursuit Genus 6 edition answer, a footnote in history - until Governor Warner granted him clemency, thereby preventing him from becoming the 1,000th person in the United States to be executed since the death penalty was brought back (like "The Family Guy"!!) in 1976. How sad. Now instead of having his name roll off the lips of Alec Trebek, Robin goes back to a life of weightlifting, trading cartons of smokes, anal rape and, worse, finding God. Poor bastard. A dubious distinction, yes, but how the hell else could the dude have made a name for himself? And, as I'm thinking about it, I'm not sure I wanna be in the Big House with a name like "Robin." "Hey Fang and Throatslash, this is Robin..." yeesh. Holy Prison Bukkake, Batman. Got a feeling I know who does the salad-tossing in that relationship. I'm sure there's a box of letters from Robin to Gov Warner: "Please!! Kill me!! Please!!!" I'm hereby dedicating this short list of "I'D LIKE TO BE THE 1,000 PERSON TO..." to my man, Robin: (ED. note: awesome list ensues)
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