3) NO AUTOMATIC KETCHUP. How come unless I file an affidavit 2 weeks in
advance signed by judges in 3 surrounding counties, every fucking thing
I order from a fast-food restaurant comes drenched in ketchup? When
did ketchup become our go-to condiment? "Oh, this guy ordered a burger,
he’s from oh, let’s see…oh, Planet Earth, so I’d better squirt a pound
of ketchup on this fucker." I can’t be the only dude in the world who
doesn’t like ketchup, can I? Why wouldn’t you assume I like mayo on
everything? Or mustard? Hey, since you’re able to read my mind, why
wouldn’t you think to show me your titties while I’m waiting? And then
they try to throw in 90 packets of ketchup while I’m leaving. I just
said "no ketchup" on my order, and now you’re chasing me down the street
to make sure I get a knapsack worth of this crap. We’re running out of
oil and we can’t figure out how to run cars on ketchup? Please. - XMASTIME
I now consider Tony Paul, a hot dog vender for the Detroit Tigers who got fired for being anti-ketchup,
a new hero:
There are rumblings the real reason was ketchup — or Marcuse’s
disdain for it. Marcuse, at the ballpark and on Twitter, has been a
strong crusader for only putting mustard on a frank. And some fans
thought he got combative when they asked for ketchup. There were
complaints filed.
No comments:
Post a Comment