Oh, Williamsburg!

I was lucky enough to only ever have to search for an apartment in Williamsburg once  therein living with 50 year-old dudes surrounded by mercury and asbestos for 14+ years, but I totally empathize with people who have to deal with real estate headlines when looking. My favorites:

EAST WILLAMSBURG - Deep Bushwick or Queens.

CHARMING APPLIANCES - The stove has knobs that do not work.

WILL NOT LAST - Awful place that will most definitely last or why would you need to write that.

GREAT LOCATION – Anywhere besides actually in Williamsburg.