Hurricanes with feminine names may kill three times as many victims because people do not perceive them as being as threatening as storms named after men, scientists said Monday."But Xmastime", you say in the voice of Craig “Ironhead” Heyward from those soap commercials (RIP), “didn't you call this years ago?"
Sigh. Yes, faithful reader. Yes I did:
And don't get me started on these names they give these things...just saw a list of the names in the que for 2009....Ana? Bill? DANNY? We don't even call it "Daniel", we go for the boyish nickname, "Danny"? Why not "Poptop"?...GRACE??? Is "Serene" unavailable?...Larry. We're actually calling a hurricane Larry. Unreal. Oh, and Rose. Cause if there's a freakish hell-storm about to land on a city and demolish buildings and kill people, you wanna name it after a flower. Christ. Not really names that make me think "maybe I should get outta town for a while." Can we do something about this? How bout instead of "Hurricane Claudette", we use "Hurricane Your ex-Wife Is Back in Town, Has Lost the 50lbs and Is Looking to Fuck the Phonebook", or "Hurricane What the...Which One of You called Me N---er?" Wouldn't these be a bit more intimidating? Camon.
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