I go the movies about once every time the comet Kahoutek makes an appearance, so the stakes are high when I actually leave my house and make the effort to go to one. The stakes were made even higher when my medium popcorn and bottled fucking water came out to be more than ($12.50) than the fucking ticket itself ($11). As much as I was looking forward to seeing this flick, I was a bit agitated by the time I sat down in the empty theater at Gallery Place. Then I got even more agitated when I noticed that in the years since I last saw a movie in the theater the previews have gotten even longer, and this still applies:
And then, of course, come the previews. We all know how ridiculous these have become. There are so many before every movie now, these things run so long that after a while you start to forget that there’s actually a movie at the end of it all. It’s like being pregnant so long you forget that you’re actually gonna have a baby, or having sex with a girl and pumping away for so long you forget that in the end you’re going to cum all over her eyes so her lids crust shut and you can steal all her shit. On and on and on these things go. But I noticed what the green screens actually say for the first time.
See that? "The following preview has been approved for ALL audiences." Why do they bother saying that? Have you ever seen one that said “This preview has been approved for audiences that are into assplay and teenage pig rape”? Do we hafta see this before every fucking trailor? And it’s not even like “come see this movie next week!” it’s “come see this movie starring Brangelina’s unborn child in 2017!!!”Finally, Chef started, and...this movie is fucking fantastic. Nice little story, great dialogue, Favreau/Leguizamo/Cannavale were fantastic, Favreau has some sweet moments with the kid, Sofia Vergara was great without being over-the-top Gloria. I recommend this with two thumbs up only because I do not have 3.
The only negatives are: 1) not nearly enough Bobby Cannavale 2) It seems to have been sponsored by Twitter 3) we have to suspend belief enough to think that Favreau not only was banging Sofia Vergara but also Scarlett Johansson... I mean camon, the shit he's cooking can't be THAT good - otherwise, can you even IMAGINE how much ass this guy must have gotten?!?
Movie: Enough Said
This is on HBO now. I don't really know what to say that everybody else hasn't said already; Julia Louis-Dreyfess and James Gandolfini are very easy and natural to watch together and Louis-Dreyfuss in particular is funny although that should be no surprise to anyone who's seen Veep. There are some negatives: 1) Gandolfini himself talking about his weight in bed would be a big turn-off for a woman - in general, they might have gone a bit overboard obsessing on his weight. 2) The scene in which Louis-Dreyfuss' character is revealed to know what's been going on behind Gandolfini/Keener's backs was horribly misplayed - instead of bumbling around wordlessly she could've just said hey look I just realized it myself and it threw me for a loop and I didn't know what to do. Or, even better, she could've cut the whole thing off at the pass as soon as she realized it herself and did a whole "OMG!" thing with them. It's not like she was plotting anything nefarious, after all.
Also, I want to know more about the little blonde girl's story - her neediness was heartbreaking and I wanted to shoot everyone who was mean to her in the face.
Enough Said is a good movie (MAYBE helped out a little bit in the reviews by the shock of Gandolfini's death) and very entirely watchable, slow one, which is no surprise coming from the writer of Friends and Money. Filmvetter review HERE.
Chef trailer:
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