Dear UPS:
It's
8pm. I'm sitting about 8 feet away on the other side of my door. You
can see my lights are on, and you can hear my tv. But no no, please just
dump my package and scurry away without bothering to knock so I know
it's there. Next time please leave a shining red light with a bell
alerting the city of DC that there's some free shit outside my apartment
if they want it.
Thank you.
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