Wednesday, June 19, 2019

Horrible, Prescient Xmastime

Xmastime back in 2011:
They had the kid who caught Jeter's 3,000th hit on during the Yankees game, and since it's Jeter OF COURSE the guy didn't hold the ball ransom for mad $crillah, OF COURSE he simply wanted to give the ball to Jeter, because of how much he's meant to everybody and "Jeter deserves it", OF COURSE the kid's father goes on and on about what a great kid he was, never gave him any trouble.  For fuck's sake, I'm surprised the ball wasn't caught by a basket of puppies who were collecting alms for the poor.

When A-Rod hits his 3,000th, the guy who gets it will somehow use the ball to set up an entire string of children's sweatshops in China, probably ones that produce heroin to sell to kids, and we'll all be enraged at how un-Jeterish A-Rod is.
I'd forgotten A-Rod's 3,000th hit was also a home run, and it turns out I was fucking right:
When the Yankees went to go collect the milestone ball, the fan who caught it, Zack Hample, turned them down.
New York had offered memorabilia in exchange for the ball, but Hample, who has written a book about how to catch baseballs at MLB games, turned them down until a deal was reached in the second week of negotiations.
Fucking hell.

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