Last Night's RNC

I'd been surprised at how dull the RNC has been, but was looking forward to Trump's speech as he is nothing if not a showman. Turns out he gave the lowest-energy speech of his life - still stuffed to the gills with lies, of course, but duller than shit. I made it through half of it. But here are some of my live Tweets from the speakers before him. Enjoy!

I'm honestly shocked at how dull the RNC has been. Trump's generally a useless idiot, but he is a showman. Did not expect this at all.

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

I seem to have spoken too early when I said the RNC has been boring: here's Ben Carson!

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

So Trump's message is that every day under his watch, more people are getting shot in the head so we should keep this party going for another 4 years? Very interesting. 11th-level Connect 4, indeed.

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

This RNC is nothing more than the chickens demanding Colonel Sanders remain in charge. MKFCGA!

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Lincoln in 1864: "If you vote for George McClellan a massive Civil War will break out, killing 600,000 Americans!" #2020RNC

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Ivanka comes out to "I'm Still Standing." Yes, her somehow managing to overcome so many obstacles in life and live to tell the tale is truly inspiring.

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Thankfully, sex with Jared has prepared Ivanka for such tepid responses from the crowd. #RNC2020

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Pretty nice response from a crowd presumably forced to sign a document expressly waiving Trump of liability if they get sick or die at this event. Nice!

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Look, I'll say what nobody else will say: Ivanka's a nice piece of ass. Well, nobody else but her dad, I mean. #RNC @TuckerCawley1

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

Low energy. Needs to turn it up - when does he bring out the Killer Kenosha Kid for a live pardon? #RNC2020

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

If there was ever a time for Kimberly Gilfoyle to come back to the mic screaming like a lunatic, this is that time. Zzzzzzzzz. #lowenergyTrump #RNC

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020

After this RNC, I can't wait for Trump to be president so he can stop all the violence and hellscapes that are happening under the current administration. MAGA!

— XMASTIME (@XMASTIMEblog) August 28, 2020