PITT: Mr. Speaker, members of the House: I shall be brief, as I have, rather unfortunately, become Prime Minister right in the middle of my exams. I look forward to fulfilling my duty in a manner of which Nanny would be proud. I shall introduce legislation to utterly destroy three enemies of the State. The first is that evil dictator, Napoleon Bonaparte.The second is my old Geography master, Bananabreath Scrigshanks. But most of all, sirs, I intend to pursue that utter slob, The Prince of Wales! Why, this year alone, he has spent 15,000 pounds on banqueting, 20,000 pounds on perfume, and — most astonishing of all — an astonishing 59,000 pounds on socks! Therefore, my three main policy priorities are: 1) War with France, 2) Tougher sentences for geography teachers; and 3) A right royal kick of the Prince’s backside!!
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