Me, first in line at Potbelly for lunch, happily waving a guy in a military uniform ahead of me in line: "Wow, look at me...I'm so nice and thoughtful! For just having to wait about two minutes I get to feel like I'm doing something nice for someone else, what a great side order to my sandwich! I should do this all the time!"
Me, realizing he was ordering a bunch of sandwiches for his crew and therein would be taking about 20-25 minutes: "I hope he gets sent to Iraq and dies in flames. Today."
😬
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