Accused of the Holocaust:
“Look, in the end am I the one who has to take full responsibility? Of course I am. Look, I don’t know who the media’s telling you killed those six million Jews, and it was my assistant who bought all those big ovens without discussing it with me first anyway, but at the end of the day the ironic shekel stops here. Look, I have no idea who decided to invade Poland in the first place, I just know it wasn’t me, but I am here today to accept full responsibility. Even though to be clear I can’t recall ever speaking of conquest for Lebensraum in the East and its ruthless Germanisation, and nobody thought more of the Jews than me - I’m the last person on Earth who would ever betray them, just ask anybody, they’ll tell you - but as the author of my own journey who, may I remind you, has at least 7 people working under me that I can’t keep track of during every single minute of every single day, I am the one who has to take full responsibility. Questions?”
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