Here's Me Solving the Economy, You're Welcome

I've given up on the idea of taxing corporations, so my solution is to flip the script on them and actually GIVE them money: every year, the government PAYS THEM 1% of their earnings that year, but instead of using that money to buy another yacht they have to promise to actually invest it all back into their company, including sharing it with the company's workers (scary socialism, I know! I know!); this seems perfectly reasonable to me and is the closest thing to a win-win we’ll see anytime soon in this runaway economy of disparity.