Return Policy

Because I am a fashionista and this is what we fashionistas do, this past Friday I was shopping with the Fashion Herald and I picked up on something I had never noticed before. Each time we went to the counter to buy something, FH would ask the counter girl their return policy. Now, I would never dream of this. I would think that if I asked such a question alarm bells would go off in the back room and they'd be like "oh, we're on to this motherfucker." And then three days later when I'd show up to return the item I'd find myself falling through a trap door en route to heavy interrogation and bamboo under the fingernails. Newman on Seinfeld leading the questioning, I would think.

But the clerk would just brightly say whatever the policy was and hand FH the receipt, practically saying "of COURSE you'll be returning it!" Some sort of secret code between women. Fascinating to me. Like nonchalantly asking the car rental company if the insurance covers driving drunk on two wheels while painting the lyrics to "Summer Wind" on a fish fillet, in my eyes. ah well. Always learning!!!!