Saturday, February 28, 2009

The Gym

The one annoying thing about working out so early in the morning in the gym is the music they pump through from the radio. Throughout the day and at night, I assume they're looping the theme to Rocky, or rocking classic rock cuts that get you moving and sweaty and hard-charging! What'do we get at 6am? THE MORNING ZOO!!!!!! Grrrr. It's tough to get fired up to the sounds of some shitheads being "whacky." "Oooooh, boy!! Maybe if I get a rockin' bod then one day I can make jokey phone calls!!!!"

Of course, I'm prolly the only one that can even ehar, since everyone else has their iPods on anyways. So.

ALSO: When I'm doing my cardio on the bike, it's very simple: I punch in that I'd like to bike for 25 minutes, and then I start pedaling as fast as I can. Every few minutes I might bump up the level, but that's it. Meanwhile, on the bike next to me comes some shithead that spends the first 15 minutes punching every button on the goddam thing over and over BOOP-BOOP-BEEP-BOOP!!!!!, entering every single piece of information he can; from age to color of eyes to first grade fucking teacher. Enough, fuckface! You're not there to create your favorite fucking D&D character, and you're not Han fucking Solo flying the gotdam Millenium Falcon. Punch in your time and start fucking pedaling, asshole!!

Fucking christ.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

arkived.

Nerdhappy said...

If you said that to the guy on the bike, and he said "This aint like dusting crops, boy. One wrong miscalculation and we could crash into a star or a meteorite or a super nova and that would end this trip real quick...", well if he said that, then I'd think he was the coolest guy ever.

Anonymous said...

Yeah that is why I am not going to the gym (But sweat on Xmas)! Anyone not suicdal after ten minutes of e.g. Q94 is suspect.