Death Be Not a Crowd (Unless it's for Me!)

Speaking of funerals, it looks like 12 people have committed suicide because Michael Jackson died. I'll be honest - I'll be fucking miffed if after I die some Xmastime fan doesn't off him/herself (preferably her.)

Of course...the proportion of people who killed themselves here to the actual number of Michael Jackson fans would be equal to someone, upon finding out I've died, plucking a hair from their arm and ... well, I guess that would be it. Hmm. Disappointing, at best.

FOR A LIST OF CELEBRITIES I WOULD KILL MYSELF OVER THEM DYING, CLICK HERE.