Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Xmas Superslices Crossing Streams

Roseanne, pilot episode 1988
Roseanne: A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him (chips off doughnut). And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials (chips off doughnut). And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego. (bites into doughnut)

The Brothers McMullan, 1995
Barry: [holds up a banana] Man is like a banana. Strong and firm, bright and phallic, and he's protected by his all-important shield. But, when a woman comes along, you know, she sees this bright phallic beast and she wants it. So, she starts peeling away your all-important shield. [peels the banana] First, she wants to see your romantic side, then she wants to see your passionate side, finally she wants to see your soft, caring, feminine side. She keeps peeling and peeling until your left there buck naked, totally exposed with your balls blowing in the wind. And that's when she gets her knife, and she cuts away your manhood piece by piece until she's having your cock in her corn flakes.

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