Friday, June 10, 2011

To You Fucking Yankee Fan Queers

 6) Guys: quit trying to win the “REAL Baseball Fan” award by acting all excited and announcing the days until pitchers and catchers begin their workouts together. Every fucking year I gotta hear “17 days till pitchers/catchers!!!” Really? Are you a pitcher on a major league baseball team? Are you a catcher? Are you going to said practices to watch? Are these exciting workouts being televised? Do even the very pitchers and catchers that show up give 2 shits about this event? No. Acting like a excitable kid about something this worthless will not get you laid, it will not inspire me to buy you a fucking beer. The season starts on April 2. Until then, the only time I wanna hear “pitchers & catchers” is at my neighborhood gay bar, thank you very much. - XMASTIME
Watching the game on tv along with the radio broadcast doesn't make a more "real, down-homey old-school baseball fan", it makes you a fucking idiot.  First of all, there is a delay of a few seconds, meaning you hear what happens before you see it.  How is this even remotely pleasurable?  What do you listen to when watching porn, audio tapes of other porn?

Second of all, John Sterling and Suzy Waldman ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE!!!!!  Who would listen to them instead of ANYONE ELSE ON THE FUCKING PLANET?  Do you put on a Beatles record, then turn down the sound to blast Vanilla Ice?  What the fuck?

Fucking hell.  Yes, you're a "real" fan.

Tho I will say I can listen to this on a fucking loop.

1 comment:

Kiko Jones said...

After 6 months of NO MLB, some folks are super enthusiastic about the advent of a new season. And pitchers and catchers reporting to Spring Training is the beginning of that countdown. Granted, it doesn't necessarily make those folks any more of a real fan than those who only care for the beginning of the season itself, but why take a shit on 'em?