Friday, September 16, 2011

Subway Thoughts, by Xmastime

I don't know what the real reason is, but whenever the subject of "why can't they make it so we can use our cell phones on the subway?" comes up, it's dismissed with the idea that the noise would be unbearable, since everybody would be talking the whole time.  First of all, that implies that anytime anyone has a free moment they immediately jump on their phones and start calling anybody they can up.  Which is inane.  At no point during any given day do I think "well, here I am, with nothing in particular to do...I should probably call someone..."

But mostly, the trains are fucking already louder than they've ever been, thanks to iPhones/Pods etc.  Every time I'm on the train I'm surrounded by motherfuckers with their earphones blasting up to fucking level 11; at best it's painful white noise, at worst I can actually hear what it is they're playing, which I won't call shit so as not to insult actual pieces of human waste.  So it's not like we're sitting quietly in a public library or church anyway.  Hell, to be honest, eavesdropping on someone yammering on the phone with the hope of some juicy gossip would be a much preferable way to pass the time than surrounded by what sound like a dozen versions of that awful noise that used to accompany going online back in the days of dial-up.  Fucking hell.

SIDE NOTE: speaking of the subway, this is 2011.  We've put men on the moon, we have smartphones, we pulled off the Kardashian wedding without a hitch.  Can we please make it so the public address system doesn't sound like Daffy Duck getting choked? Has anyone ever understood a single fucking thing that's been said through these speakers?  And the volume can be reduced to a mere ear-splitting, please.

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