Little House on the Prairie

Today's listing for Little House on the Prairie:

The Richest Man in Walnut Grove: a company owing money to Charles goes bankrupt, leaving him deeply in debt.

What the - isn't that EVERY episode of Little House? Something bad happens to Pa so the girls have to take jobs to get some money, of course keeping so a secret from Pa while burning with shame from the scorn heaped upon them by the other children, and at the very end they present Pa with the money so he can pay off his debt at the Mercantile, causing him to bubble up and chew his fist claiming to be "the richest man in Walnut Grove" to Nels, who for a split second is jealous of Charles since his wife looks like a bag of assholes until he remembers "oh wait, I'm rich as shit."

Couldn't they have ONE episode where Pa announces he's broke and the girls yell "oh for FUCK's sake you broke-dick motherfucker: GET A JOB!!!!!!" and, amidst cheers from their classmates, blow dudes just for the fuck of it? Camon.

Nels: That's quite a family you've got there. I'd like to think my young'uns would pull together like that if things got bad, but like I said, we've always been very lucky when it came to money. Believe it or not, Charles, I think you're the richest man in Walnut Grove.
Charles: Nels, I know I am.
Nels: I'm just kidding, pig fucker. My stool has more money than your sorry ass.

Heh heh heh. Remind yall of my previous Little House genius? 

The episode I just watched featured the men from Walnut Grove playing the Green Stockings of nearby Sleepy Eye. At the end of the episode Caroline turns to Charles and says that him playing baseball is good cause it, get this, "gets you outdoors" and "gives you some exercise."

What?

This dude is a farmer! In the 19th century! AND he works outside at a mill!!! What the fuck; has he been spending too much time inside the very house he built with his bare hands dickering around reading "Stuff Midwest Farmers Like" on his iPhone all day? Jesus. Dude's outside plowing 100 acres with a toothbrush and carrying horses around on his back and she's pissed off about the 90 seconds a week he comes inside. "Weren't you just inside 2 days ago?!?! Get the fuck outside and build a hayloft using only your feet and a leather strap, you fucking pussy!!!!" Man. Things have changed.