The Internet Sucks?

Here's a list of 8 Things The Internet Ruined; I would suggest that they forgot and important one, owing mostly to Facebook: having to remember people's birthdays, ie my only (obsolete, thanks to the internet) talent:

6) I’m really great at remembering people’s birthdays. I meet someone and they mention their birthday, then BAM! I got it locked in for life. Every year on your birthday I will call or write to you, making sure you know that on your day I’m thinking of you and wish you the best.

HOWEVER

These birthday greetings are usually accompanied with 20 minutes of “boy, can you believe I remembered your birthday? Wow, aren’t I something? How bout that! Are you right now thinking how wonderful I am because I remembered your birthday??!?! Wow!!” Christ. I remember a birthday, and I act like I’m The Amazing Randy pulling a gopher out of my ass “wow!! Look at that!!!!!” And of course I don’t “remember” to buy you a gift or buy you a round at the bar; surely my remembering your day is enough of a gift. Jesus fucking Christ.