Poolio

McCarren Park waited for me to leave before finally opening up, and then everything went to hell because there were fights, and HERE'S some of the inside dope from a lifeguard:

One of the lifeguards called me over while I was watching the baby pool the other day. "There’s poop in the pool,' he said. 'It’s scattered everywhere." I saw one kid step on a piece. I tried to tell the parents to get out, but no one listened to me. I had to yell at them that there was feces in the pool.

We cleared out the pool and made everyone stand on the sides. The rule is five minutes for poop and 25 minutes for throw-up. Luckily, there were two new lifeguards, so we made them clean it up.

Why do they need 5x as much time for throw-up than shit? I'd be WAY more outraged to find doo doo floating in the pool. Wtf?