---------------------------------------------------------------------
Tough Guys!
Though I did not let myself watch my usual Melrose at 4pm followed by a double shot of BH 90210 today, I did think they deserved a little thought on my part. And all I could think of was how the fuck did shrimpy, hair gel-shorn, $200 t-shirt wearing white pussies like Dylan and Jake become the “tough” guys on their shows? Who casted these cats?
“I’m gonna need a gruff, no-nonsense tough guy who with a glowering look can let the bikers at the bar know to not fuck with him...BINGO!”
"Hi guys!"
“and ooooooooh, we’ll put him on a bike! With a helmet!”
“Vroom vroom!!!”
“I’m gonna need a gruff, no-nonsense tough guy who with a glowering look can let the bikers at the bar know to not fuck with him...BINGO!”
"Hi guys!"
“and ooooooooh, we’ll put him on a bike! With a helmet!”
“Vroom vroom!!!”
I mean, if Dylan came up to you all angry looking for a fight, would you even notice him? Camon.
“I’m so tough I punch myself in the head during my Salon 70 photo shoots.”
Same thing with Melrose. The older, even MORE gruff Jake...lookout everyone, he’s a loner!!...even though he shares a swimming pool with 10 other people. I’m sorry, but if I’m about to get into a fight with some dude and I find out he has a swimming pool where he lives, any intimidation that might have been there is gone. Drained, even.
Oh no, here’s our tuff guy waiting to whup your ass.....
“I’m so tough I punch myself in the head during my Salon 70 photo shoots.”
Same thing with Melrose. The older, even MORE gruff Jake...lookout everyone, he’s a loner!!...even though he shares a swimming pool with 10 other people. I’m sorry, but if I’m about to get into a fight with some dude and I find out he has a swimming pool where he lives, any intimidation that might have been there is gone. Drained, even.
Oh no, here’s our tuff guy waiting to whup your ass.....
....just don’t get no blood on his incredibly pressed, tucked in t-shirt (ooooohh, BLACK tee! Scary!!!) Again. I don’t think I’ve ever lost a fight to a dude with his shirt tucked in. Or with hair like this:
I mean, come on Aaron Spelling. Like your daughter with her “tits” and “acting” at least try to fool us. We deserve that much, no?
“No. You don’t. And as soon as my Balanchine method step class is over I’m gonna kick. your. ass.”
“No. You don’t. And as soon as my Balanchine method step class is over I’m gonna kick. your. ass.”
“Get him, Dylan...and yeah, your hair looks great...WAY great, man.”
No comments:
Post a Comment