When asked about his daughter getting to the age where she's going to start dating, Charles Barkley said, "I figure if I kill the first one, word will get out." - XMASTIMETHIS ARTICLE HERE has to be the first time I've ever sen a father wish good sex upon his daughter:
I’m not the guard who locks you in the tower. Ideally, I am my daughter’s safe space, a garden to return to when the world has proved a little too cruel, a place where she can recuperate and reflect upon past mistakes and know that here, there is someone who loves her wholeheartedly and will hug her until the tears dry.
That’s what I want for you, sweetie. A bold life filled with big mistakes and bigger triumphs.
Now get out there and find all the things you fucking love, and vice versa.I'll never have a daughter so I'll never hafta worry about such a thing, but this is very interesting, and the kind of open honesty that seems to only exist because the internet does.
Meanwhile, I'll also never hafta worry about being scared of a girlfriend's father either:
I'm pretty sure I'll never hafta go through any of the ol' "scared of the girlfriend's father" nonsense in this lifetime. I'm 35 now. And let's face it - I'm such a loser jerkoff of a mess that even if I started getting my shit togther right now, I'd prolly be 38 by the time I got a girlfriend worthy enough of bothering to meet her folks. And if I ever do get my fer-shizzle together I'll definiely be the king of the beach so I'll most like be tapping some 24 or 25 year old ass. Which would make her father about 6 or 7 years older than me. I'm sorry, but I'm not doing the respectful, you're so scary routine with some fuckwad who just barely remembers Kristy McNichol having a career more than myself.
"Xmastime, it's a pleasure to finally meet you."
"Yeah, cool, Ron."
"Um...that's Mr. Clayton to you, Xmas."
"Yeah...hey Ronny does her mother queef as much as this one? fucking christ." (feet on table, spitting out lone sunflower seed)
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