Old Cell Phone Suckage

I have a suspicion that "igh" making the hard "i" sound would never had happened if texting on cell phones was around back when they came up with that shit, right? How fucking aggravating is that shit - one of the most used groups of letters we have, and all three are on the same number. Slows everything down. My thumb going round the keypad in a blinding flurry, knocking out whole words in seconds and then i...pause, wait for cursor to move...g...pause, wait for cursor to move...h...gotta go find phone I just threw into the street...fuuuuuuck! Luckily of course this is sometimes overshadowed by the fact that for some reason to use the number 1 or 0 I have to go through about 15 fucking symbols for each one. 1 and 0, the most fundamental and primary of all the numbers, and I gotta get fucking carpel tunnel to type the number 10. - XMASTIME

What If? asks the important question:

"I use one of those old phones where you type with numbers—for example, to type "Y", you press 9 three times. Some words have consecutive letters on the same number. When they do, you have to pause between letters, making those words annoying to type. What English word has the most consecutive letters on the same key?"

The answer:

...nonmonogamous, which requires you to type seven consecutive letters (nonmono) with the "6" key.

And yes, of course I figured it out before looking up the answer. Of course.

And ah yes, Paddy Mac cell phone memories!


"Yeah? well I tell you what baby, how bout I get there when I fucking get there!!"















"I...I...I...yes dear....yes dear....but -...yes dear.....I'm sorry...yes dear..."